I think I could handle him not visiting if he would take the time to show he actually remembers he has a son when he is back in Minnesota. He has only called me once in the last 3 years, and he was drunk. He has only called Michael once ever. When I ask if we can talk online about Michael he does not reply. Not once has he ever sent off a message asking how Michael is.

David can prevent me from moving any further away than I am now. Things went really bad with my mother once, she is manic depressive and I askde him straight out if he would stop me from moving and he told me he would. 

All I want is for him to keep one promise. I want him to either have a presence in Michael's life or none at all. 

I do tire of people telling me to go out and date. I do not get to go out. I prefer to be home with my son when he goes to bed. My mother can watch him occasionally on a Thursday night, but I rarely have money to waste. I am not a drinker, so there is really few options for meeting people. And I have tried dating knowing dang well how I felt for someone else-David. It really is not fair using a guy to get over him, or letting him think I feel more than I do. To be honest, I am not even sure I want someone in my life. I can barely keep it together right now, and nobody should have to pick up my mess. Michael was hurt deeply by the last guy I was serious about. We ended up engaged, and he wanted to adopt Michael if David did not get himself in order. I ended up being abused. But nothing hurt more seeing Michael's heart broken when he walked out. It was after that when Michael started regressing and for a long time he would not have anything to do with any male. Being older it is even easier for him to get attatched. I want to get my life in order before I think about adding anybody to it. 

I wouldn't worry about terminating rights at this point.  Why bother?  It's not like David is trying to take Michael away from you.  If you are worried about David popping by for a few hours every six months, I think you could probably just talk it out with him in live chat or on the phone.  I think he would respect how you feel and I don't think he would necessarily get angry and threaten not to pay child support.  It's all in how you sugar-coat your feelings and present the situation to him. 

Can you fill out forms over email?  Maybe you could do that through the snail mail or just have him sign on the dotted line when he visits, which will take 2 seconds.  Can you email David the IEP stuff and just ask him if he has any input?  He probably won't and then you can just do what you think is best.  If David is the kind of guy who hates paperwork then that could be one reason why he is shortening the visit in the first place.

The length of his visit may have absolutely nothing to do with you or Michael.  David's problems are David's problems, and like you said, only the Lord knows what's going on with David.   

Well, I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but Wyatt does the same thing as Michael when he sees men he thinks are nice.  He ADORES the principal at his school.  Here's an excerpt from a report we got just this week from Wyatt's teacher:  "Wyatt has show an increased fascination with new adults that come into the classroom...This is particularly true when male adults come into the classroom or if Wyatt sees them outside on the school campus as well.  Wyatt will go over to them and take his/her hand, make eye contact and pull them to go alongside of him." 

I cannot imagine how frustrated you are feeling about this visit with David.  You could look at this mini-visit as totally non-productive from an administrative head-of-household point of view.  You could metaphorically put it in a balloon and let it go.  You could make the whole visit just for Michael to have a little male bonding time, with David serving as more of a generic male person than a Dad.

Honey it takes more than blood to be a daddy. There are plenty

of good men out there. It sounds to me like a "surrogate" father

would be helpful. Maybe somebody just a little older than you.

Ive never mentioned it before but my husband is ten years

older than me. Maybe David is trying to be faithful so he's

avoiding an overnight, who knows? If he doesnt want to be

a full time daddy to that sweet little boy of yours I'd find myself

a good man that does =) Keep your chin up.