Siblings
I'm a 23 year old woman and I live in Scotland, United Kingdom. I have 2 older brothers and a younger sister. My oldest brother is currently 30 and has low functioning autism. He has severe learning disabilities and no speech but his personality still shines through all the problems that autism brings. He understands every word you say to him and it's amazing how he can say so much from just from his facial expressions.
I think it's great that there is increasingly more and more awareness of autism out there but there are a few things that I still find most people do not seem to appreciate:
1) Autistic children are beautiful and increasingly given additional support and focus but I think many people forget that autism affects the individuals throughout their whole adult lives too.
2) Autism affects the whole family not just the autistic individual(s) and that includes siblings who can often be forgotten about as a result of the more pressing problems of the family member with autism.
3) Autism is a very wide umbrella that covers the full range of the autistic spectrum and I see people sometimes having good awareness of Asperger's syndrome but not appreciating that there are many people at the other end of the spectrum, for example my brother who is completely non-verbal.
I don't know if anyone will ever read this blog but I hope that they do because I'd like to help at least one person who has struggled with the problems that I did as a result of being the sibling of someone with autism. I was 14 the first time I had the Internet but it wasn't as well developed as it is now. I think the Internet can be a great source of support and information and one which I do wish I had had growing up.
I love my brother and I was very close to him as a child but autism has had a huge impact on my life (both in positive and negative ways). As a teenager I focused on the bad parts and I became very angry, depressed and resentful. I have always helped care for my brother from a very young age but I started to worry that I would have to look after him in the future once my parents were no longer fit enough to do so. However, once I got past these feelings I learnt to see the positive impact that growing up with my brother has had on me too. It has undoubtedly shaped the person I am today but it taught me how to be tolerant of everyone, to learn all the facts about a situation before I make judgements, and how to see past disabilities to the personality of the person behind that.
- MyBrotherHasAutism's blog
- Log in or register to post comments
Comments
The other thing people have a
The other thing people have a tendency to forget is that Developmental Delay is not Developmental Statis. 21 isn't even really a magical age for neurotypical children turning into adults, and for the autistic, the brain's clock might be off by DECADES. But change does occur in autistic individuals; I only know of one child who does not change, and Brooke Greenburg doesn't have autism as we know it- she just got "stuck" somehow 19 years ago and never grew up physically OR mentally. If your child can crawl, your child does NOT have "Syndrome X" and will grow up eventually. Maybe not until the late 20s, maybe not until after 50, but eventually.
I'm so sad that there are as
I'm so sad that there are as ignorant people as you in the world. I thought this looked like a website that may be a source of support but instead there are ignorant people like yourself pushing lies onto vulnerable people looking for help. I won't be on this site again but please stop spreading your disgusting lies. What you've said is not true and it enrages me that you would give others false hope.
Nothing I said is a lie. A
Nothing I said is a lie. A good example is Kanner Patient 0, Donalt Triplet. He's now 65. He didn't learn to read until he was in his teens, he didn't learn to drive until he was in his 20s.
It isn't false hope. 3% of autistics, both low and high functioning, go on to independence. It sometimes takes decades, but it does happen.
The key is a supportive family that doesn't give up hope, and that's the reason why I spread hope.
Oh, and BTW, I'm 41 years old and I was diagnosed with high functioning autism at age 30 after a truly horrible childhood from not being diagnosed. I currently earn $40/hour doing computer programming- one of my four main obsessions- and I'm married with a special needs child myself that I'm teaching to read and that we only potty trained at age 9.
Autism is indeed forever- you're right about that. But that doesn't mean there aren't other ways around it.